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Submitted on
November 13, 2012
File Size
1.2 KB
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Sta.sh
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397
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27 (who?)
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40
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He wishes to burn away it all
Hear the screams of the ones
Who made his heart tear apart

Blood will flow
As the sun sets
Hope will fall
As night arrives

His corrupted mind desires for eternal destruction

---

As all who had hurt him now died away
His hatred yet grows deep within
As he finally starts to realize
He is the one meant to die

---

It's now the time to break his own mind

My purpose is to be undone
As all my decisions
Lead to misery
Hate
And despair...

I am the one to blame


He feels so numb
Lost he is forevermore

---

He slits his wrists open
Laughs as the blood flows
Forming a crimson river
On the frost ground

No tears he will shed
As his bones break
His body starts to fail
He falls on his knees

He lays crippled
With a broken heart
And finally he knows
He has ended it all

---

I chose the wrong way...
If someone ever gets the purpose and true meaning of this poem... that someone knows very deeply how I feel.
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:iconlaur-icula:
This is one of the most powerful poems I have ever read. The meaning is practically jumping off of the screen. Such sadness, guilt, self-hatred. They are all right in front of the readers eyes. The world flow is fantastic, and you managed to tell an entire story in just twelve simple stanzas. I don't normally read poetry because it's not my favorite genre, but you made it enjoyable for me; though the meaning is very upsetting. I'm pretty positive I understand the meaning of this poem. So I will most likely note you, if that's okay with you dear.
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
3 out of 4 deviants thought this was fair.

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:iconchibineko112:
ChibiNeko112 Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
This is lovely. It ultimately broke my heart with it's beauty. It's so real. And it's your knowledge of reality that makes you beautiful.
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:iconscullreaper:
ScullReaper Featured By Owner Dec 31, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you
Reply
:iconchibineko112:
ChibiNeko112 Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
You're welcome.
Reply
:iconinlovewithutopia:
InLoveWithUtopia Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012  Student Artisan Crafter
Quite a nice piece, truly fine. :)
Reply
:iconscullreaper:
ScullReaper Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you
Reply
:iconxxfrozen:
XxFrozen Featured By Owner Nov 17, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I seem to be the only one that doesn't really get this. Yes, it's dark, and yes, not everyone will get the message behind it with the first reading, but I'm not seeing exceptionally high quality here.

A lot of the wording is awkward, like "Who made his heart tear apart" which sounds like it's in the wrong order (maybe "who tore his heart apart") and "As all who had hurt him now died away" which uses past in "has" and "died" but then present in "now." To me, this was very distracting from the feeling the poem was trying to convey.

I do know that poetry is a form of journal-writing for some people, and that's what this seems to be - exceptionally personal and individual. However, this also makes it difficult to relate to. I think I have the same problem in my writing, and it's difficult to get past that, but it is a definite direction to work towards.
Reply
:iconscullreaper:
ScullReaper Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Eh?
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:icondragonmark01:
Dragonmark01 Featured By Owner Nov 16, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I get it... Please, note me. I want to talk to you.
Reply
:iconscullreaper:
ScullReaper Featured By Owner Nov 16, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Note me.. I dunno what to say.
Reply
:iconrowlingson39:
Rowlingson39 Featured By Owner Nov 15, 2012   General Artist
Oh man I LOVE THIS
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